BY HAZEL CHEN, JUNIOR, CVHS

Life isn’t fair, I learned that the hard way. When I was younger, my mother would tell me the story of Yin and Yang. She would always say that they resemble my twin sister and me; I’m Yin, and Jennie is Yang. It was her way of telling us that we needed each other. In good, there is always evil, and in evil, there is always good. In other words, light and darkness create a balance in the world. Although she was never as into mother’s story as I was, Jennie takes on her role as Yang very well, and sadly, it’s the same for me and Yin. Jennie is popular, pretty, talented, and the light that shines through dark, stormy skies. I, on the other hand, am a friendless, talentless loner who doesn’t even exist. 

Even though we’re twins, we couldn’t be any more different. Although she’s only two minutes older than me, she got everything I didn’t, all the good luck, better traits, she’s even next in line for the throne just for being born before me. Someday, she’ll be the queen of Solarie, and I’ll just be the same as always, invisible. But then again, I could never see myself as king. Jennie is the embodiment of light, while I’m just her shadow. Plants thrive in light, children play and enjoy the sun, you can almost do anything. Meanwhile, darkness only brings sadness and fear. She was always the ray of sunshine in the family, something I wish I could be. I see it in my father’s eyes every day: I’m just a disappointment, a mistake. School wasn’t any better either.

Jennie always said school was her happy place, but who could blame her? Solarie Academy, the richest school in town, perfect uniforms, top professors, glorious. But what comes with glory are secrets that lie within the hallways. Arjin Kulermhn, the school’s top athlete, funny, popular, smart, but worst of all, a bully. He has everyone wrapped around his finger, thinking he’s a perfect little angel. He has everyone fooled, even her. Naria, president of the student council and my first love. She was my best friend, the only person besides Jennie who would ever bat an eye at me. Naturally, like any other boy in this school, I fell for her. But she had her eyes on someone else, that someone being Arjin. Arjin only started picking on me when he found out I had a thing for her. Ever since then, he would beat me up behind her back whenever he had the chance. I never told Jennie about any of this, not my crush on Naria, not about Arjin, and certainly not that I wished every day that I was her. I’ll never forget the day she finally understood how lucky she was, the day she realized everything she ever knew was built on lies. 

“Hey Jennie, isn’t that your brother?” 

Jennie turns her head towards where Ruby was pointing, an alleyway behind the school building, narrow, but just barely noticeable enough to see what awaited her. She saw a familiar set of green eyes staring down with evil intent. Jennie followed the gaze down to see even more familiar brown hair. She was horrified to realize that it was Justin, face bruised and upset. Arjin was holding out his fist and grabbing onto Justin’s collar with his other hand. 

“H-hey! Stop that!” 

Arjin’s confident smirk had turned into a sheepish frown. He ran away at the sight of Jennie, throwing Justin on the floor. Jennie walked up to Justin, who was holding his bruised cheek in pain. He looked unfazed, as if this was a normal occurrence that he’d written on his schedule. Jennie didn’t bother helping him up. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” She didn’t look at him with empathy, but instead with the familiar disappointment that he was so used to seeing. 

“You wouldn’t understand.” 

“Do I need to?” An awkward silence. The answer was yes. “How long has this been going on?” she continued. 

“Since August.” 

“And it never crossed your mind once to tell me about it? I could have done something!” 

“That’s why I never told you.”

She could have ended all my suffering with a snap of her fingers, and that was the reason I never told her. What Jennie didn’t know was that I resented her for everything. She was born a star, always had the spotlight shining on her since childhood. There are two sides to yin and yang, two sides of a coin, just like how there are two of us. Like Yin and Yang, Jennie and I are opposites. No matter what she did, she was always praised and fawned over. But no matter how much I tried to become like her, I will only ever live in her shadow.

But I did know. He never told me because he thought I had the power to fix everything for him, but I didn’t. Arjin was always like that; his “perfect little angel” act was a lie. The truth is, no one likes him; people all just pretend to like him because they’re scared. I would know, I used to date him, but of course, Justin doesn’t know that. We’re not that different, him and I, not as different as he says we are. I always assumed Arjin would never lay a finger on him, knowing he’s my brother. I knew about his crush on Naria, and obviously, that he always resented me. The only thing I didn’t know was that Arjin was beating him up behind the school, but what’s new? Arjin bullies everyone, honestly I shouldn’t be surprised at this point. The only reason he stopped when he saw me was that I was the heir to the throne. It wasn’t out of respect, but out of fear because I was the only one in the whole school who had actual power over him. 

Justin and I were never really that different to begin with. I always envied him, not that I was ungrateful for what I had. Before I knew about the bullying, I always thought Justin had the dream life. Most people wouldn’t understand, but sometimes I’d give anything to be alone, to do what I want, and just to be myself without having to put up a face for everyone else to see. Sure, I wanted to become queen, but it would be great if all the pressure were taken off of me just for a day, to see what it’s like. Justin would hate me for this, wouldn’t he?

What Justin doesn’t know is that being the center of attention isn’t as great as it seems. The more friends you have, the more haters you will too. Everywhere I go, I’m known as the future queen of Solarie and never as me. People act like they worship the ground I walk on, but in reality, they all just think I’m a stuck-up little princess who never had to lift a finger to work. People use me, pretending to be friends with me just for their own benefit, and then talk about me when they think I can’t hear them. Dad doesn’t make it easier for me either. Justin thinks being neglected by him is bad, but he hasn’t tried having him watch his every move, tell him what to say, how to act, and whom he should associate with. I never got to tell him any of this. After I found out what he was dealing with, we got into a fight and never really talked again. He never told me why he didn’t tell me about any of it, although I already knew why. He didn’t want to make things harder on himself; he didn’t want the pain of knowing we weren’t equals to resurface again. It didn’t matter who was jealous of who, I will always think of him as my equal. Maybe it’s twin telepathy or something, but after that day, I had this weird intuition that Arjin never stopped torturing him. Every day, Justin would come home with more bruises that he would cover up or disguise. Every day, he grew more distant as I grew more worried. I didn’t want to play hero, to rub my status in his face again. I wasn’t standing up for him as the future queen of Solarie, but as his big sister. It was my responsibility to set things right. If only I knew what trouble that would cause. 

Naria was rummaging through her locker, looking for her math textbook. When she closed her locker, she was startled by Jennie, who had been standing there for a while. “Woah! Hey Jennie, you scared me.” 

“Sorry,” Jennie mumbled. She had always carried herself with confidence, never once slurring her words. If it weren’t Naria she was talking to, anyone would have realized something was wrong. 

“What do you need?” Naria asked, innocently. She looked at Jennie with her big purple eyes. She was kind-hearted; you could immediately tell just by the way she looked at you. But she couldn’t seem to read the room even if her life depended on it. 

“Yeah, actually, y’know that boyfriend of yours?”

“Arjin? Is he in trouble?” 

“He will be soon.” 

“What?” 

Jennie started as if it were a normal conversation. She never broke character once, uncomfortably calm even though she was furious. Naria never picked up on it. 

“Are you aware that he’s been picking on my brother because of you?” 

Naria looked at Jennie in confusion. “He wouldn’t.. Would he?” Jennie raised an eyebrow at her. They both knew it was true. Naria swept past Jennie and marched down the hall, looking for Arjin. Jennie followed hesitantly, slightly nervous for what would come next. They found Arjin sitting on the bleachers of the gym, spinning a basketball on his finger. He was surrounded by his friends, who were all just as cocky as he was. Jennie knew none of them really liked each other, but who was she to judge? Naria walked up to him. Their conversation was short and escalated rather quickly. 

“Hey Nari–” 

“Have you been bullying Justin?” 

“What?” 

“Have you?” 

“N-no, of course not! What’s all this about, Nari?” 

“You’re lying.” 

“I’m not.” Arjin stood up nervously and put his hand on her shoulder. All of his friends watched them, silently amused as if they were watching a romcom. Jennie stood at the bottom of the bleachers with her arms crossed. She was uneasy but also wanted to know where this was going. Naria wasn’t having any of Arjin’s lies. It was unlike her to pick up on other people’s deceit, even Arjin’s. It was clear that everyone underestimated how much Justin actually meant to her. 

“We’re over.”

“What?!” Those two words sent both Arjin and Jennie into shock. Surely there wasn’t enough evidence for Naria to do that. No one had expected any of that from a girl so blinded by love, or maybe her love just wasn’t directed at where everyone thought it was. 

“W-what do you mean by that, Nari? I’ve always been good to you, right? You said I was the best boyfriend ever just yesterday–” Arjin was almost at his knees. He had a nervous smile on his face, the type of smile where your face simply doesn’t know how to react from the shock. All his friends were trying to contain their laughter. Jennie’s face twitched for a split second at the satisfaction. This is what he deserved, this is what everyone wanted to see. Arjin locked eyes with Naria, her once cheerful face now filled with hatred. Arjin’s nervousness turned into insanity in an instant, only Jennie caught on. “No, no, no, Naria. What have you done?” Jennie felt her stomach turn. Only she knew what that look meant, only she knew what Arjin was actually capable of. 

“Heh, that brat,” mumbled Arjin. He stood up, basketball falling out of his arm. Jennie watched as it rolled off the bleachers, each bounce making her skin crawl. “When I find him, I’ll show him just what happens to people who defy me.” 

“No! Don’t!” Arjin didn’t listen and stormed out of the gym, leaving a terrified Jennie, confused Naria, and all his friends whispering to each other, making a joke out of him. Arjin hovered the lockers until he got to Justin’s. He knew Justin would be in there. Justin had a tendency of hiding in his locker and everyone knew it. No one cared, but they noticed. Since the lockers were enchanted, there was plenty of room in there for him to wallow in isolation. 

“Open the damn door, brat!” he banged and barked. Arjin had lost all control, every last ounce of self-respect holding him back from making a scene. Maybe he actually loved Naria. Maybe he thought he had nothing left to lose after losing her and being embarrassed in front of all his friends. Most likely, it was because he was blinded by rage. His reputation was ruined. By Justin, nonetheless. He couldn’t fathom the fact that his sweet Naria, the girl he spent hours brainwashing with flowers and chocolates to dump him, just like that. He made sure Justin was kept in her past, that he couldn’t do anything to get between them, only for him to ruin everything he built without even as much as lifting a finger.

 “I said open up!” Justin timidly cracked open the door, enough for Arjin to stick his arm in and pull him out. He was small and frail. He didn’t grow as big as the other boys in his grade. He only barely grew taller than Jennie in the last year or so, which made it easy for Arjin to push him around. Arjin grabbed him by the collar once again. His shirt was practically designed with Arjin’s fingerprints. 

“Who do you think you are, you little asshole? Still think you have a chance with my girl, or are you just stirring up shit to keep your loner ass entertained? What? The little kitten’s too scared to fight a lion? Answer me!” he shoved Justin at the lockers with so much force that it shook the whole row. Everyone watched as Arjin held his fist up to Justin’s already bruised face. It was still healing from the last time they got into a fight. Justin didn’t even flinch. Something shifted in him, all the light in his eyes faded at the sight of Arjin.

“Let go.” For the first time ever, instead of being on the verge of tears, Justin defended himself against Arjin. 

“What did you say to me?” 

Justin struck Arjin with an uppercut, breaking his nose. Blood flew everywhere. Everyone was shocked; some were recording. “Someone call a teacher,” they heard in the crowd, but Justin couldn’t care less. He couldn’t see anything but the bright lights that lit up the hallway. Everything was a blur, everyone was just a silhouette, an audience, while he was finally in the spotlight he always wished he had. 

“Agh! You monster!” Arjin held his nose, blood spilling onto the white tiles on the floor. 

“So I’m the monster now?” 

Arjin held up his fist, still holding his nose with his other hand. He was about to strike Justin, but Jennie stepped in. “Enough! I started it! He had nothing to do with this!” She didn’t mean to take his spotlight from him, but she couldn’t stand watching this any longer. Arjin tore away from Justin for a brief moment as teachers finally arrived at the scene. He grumbled as he was led to the office. Justin followed behind him, his head hanging lower than ever before. 

Without Yin, there is no Yang. And without Yang, there is no Yin. You see, the circle in the middle of each side shows how there is an aspect of each other in both of them. Justin released his inner Yang that day, his inner me. I, on the other hand, stood there like a coward, useless until the last second. I watched him get thrown to the wall, but couldn’t whip up the courage to move until the very end, and even then, all I could do was yell. Justin and I have changed schools since then. Dad was furious with him, but he didn’t seem to care as much. He finally told our parents everything that’s been happening in the past year. Somehow, this incident put us on better terms; we’re even closer than we were before, actually. I guess there really are two sides to us, like two sides of a coin.